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The unappeal of parenthood
An interesting discussion came up on the childfree forum recently – a forum goer asked if we were childfree because we don’t want kids or don’t want to be parents (to human babies).
The answer for me is: both.
I’ve mentioned in numerous earlier posts the reasons why I have made the choice to be childfree and why I don’t regret it. I like not having school fees and having to buy nappies, I like having a disposable income and extra time on my hands for holidays.
Alongside not wanting to breed children, I also don’t want to be a parent to human children. For numerous reasons:
- To be a parent means for the first years of the childs life, the child is totally dependent on you. No thanks.
- To be a parent means that for the first years of the childs life, you will NEVER be alone. The concept of private time with yourself or your partner goes out the window. I like my private time.
- I like having sex all over the house and furniture.
- To be a parent means your child may one day grow up to be a self centered arsehole with an undeserved sense of entitlement. I don’t want to have to monitor my every move and action so that doesn’t happen.
- Did I mention that I like privacy?
- Did I mention that I like having sex – everywhere? All over the house?
- Did I mention that I like sleep?
Now parents like to combat this with “It’s all worth it in the end!” which is their way of trying to make their loss of privacy, sleep, sex life, income and time seem less hideous. I, on the other hand, like all those things and don’t want to give them up nor have the responsibility of another for many years. I’ve thought long and hard about my decision which has come from a place of honesty and maturity – do I really want to make myself and another human being miserable? Do I want the constant stress and loss of sleep? Do I want a loss of privacy and no more sex? Do I want to have another human being impact on my life and my partners leading to everyone being miserable which in the end would only harm the child? No. Do I want time to focus on getting a great career so my partner and I can have a disposable income so we don’t have to live paycheck to paycheck? Yes I do.
So no parenting human children for me.